Ratih ‘Love’

Okay, it was June 30, 2007 morning, I went to my sister house in Gunung Sahari, wearing skirt, girly shirt, and 3cm white high heels sandals by busway. In the afternoon, Mommy, my sister (Mba Dewi), my brother (Mas Nunu), my brother-in-law’s sister (Yuri), n me, went to Mangga Dua Square by 3 Bajajs, we did the ‘Mie Panjang Umur’ Ritual in GM. I actually ordered ‘Mie Ayam Cah Jamur’ because I thought that would be ‘Yamien Ayam with Jamur’. But then…TETOT! It was not Yamin, it was really ‘Mie Ayam Cah Jamur’. I looked at Mommy’s order ‘Yamien Ayam Jamur’, it looked more delicious…then i said, "Waaaakkk!!! Why do I always order the wrong menu? I thought mine would like that…(pointed to Mommy’s and Sister’s)" then..Mommy offered to exchange her with mine

After eating, Mommy, Mba Dewi, Yuri, n me went shopping for Bocin (Bocah Cinta - Fetus’s name). Gosh! That little creature does need lots of stuffs!!!! We bought clothes, hats, hands and feet gloves, breast pumps, baby milk bottles, blankets, ‘perlak’, baby bed-set, etc..We got discount and bonus because we bought lots…The store owner even said, "yg ini, ini (pointed to Yuri and Me), nanti kalau hamil ke sini juga belanjanya". My reaction: said ‘Amin’ and grinned.

We went back to my sister’s place by Bemo (a public transport which looks like angkot but the door is on the back side and it has only 3 wheels). We forced ourselves to use 1 Bemo and I can hardly sit and FYI, my thigh got pinched and became worse when Bemo rode on railways! Bocin! This is the proof of your aunty love, I did sacrifice my thigh for you! So be nice to me when you finally meet me! Wakakakak!

At night, we had dinner in Bandar Jakarta, Ancol. It was a bad time: weekend and holiday seasons…so Ancol was poured by lots and lots of people. I had to line up about 30 minutes to finally get a table for 6 (Mommy, Mba Dewi, Mas Nunu, Bang Dodi *brother-in-law, Yuri, and Me).

I picked: 1 Ikan Pecah Kulit (Mackerel) (originally, I wanted to order 2 Mackerels, but after saw the size of the fish, I picked only 1, the biggest); 1 Ikan Ayam-Ayam (originally, I wanted to order 2 Ikan Ayam-Ayam also, but the man from restaurant said that it took lots time to be done, while I knew well my family was in hunger, so I only picked 1, also the biggest); Squid (Well, the man from the restaurant asked me, "The Egg Squid or just Plain Squid?"…hmmm..I knew the Egg Squid would cost more than the Plain one, so I answered at once, "The Plain One!" wekekekek); Prawn (Okey, the man from the restaurant also asked me, "The Super, The Big, The Mid, or The Small one?" at once also I answered, "The Mid!"), and Shell (I wanted to order Shell that I usually ate, but I saw it nowhere, so I asked him, "you know, with stripes and wavy texture shell?" the man pointed on some shell and I looked at it, said ‘hell, no! the price’s a killing! 10.000rb/100gram!’ inside my head, instead i said, "no, no..not that one…" then I kept looking and found an almost empty pond with few empty shell, "this, this one (which I found it’s name is Feathered Shell" I said entusiastically, but the man said, "we ran out of it" I was so sad that time because I thought I could order Shell to make my sister happy (from what I heard from her, she really wanted to eat Shell), so I kept looking for the alternative (read: another cheap shell) but all I saw was high price Shells… I almost gave up and ordered ‘whatever shells’ that I thought might still available to be paid, but then I saw a full basket of Feathered Shell, just arrived, still fresh from the ocean! Thanks God!!!, & Sayur Kangkung.

These were the menu:

1) Deep Fried Ikan Pecah Kulit with separate sauce,

2) Grilled Ikan Ayam-Ayam Sweet-Chilly Flavour,

3) Grilled Squid with Soya Bean sauce,

4) Prawn with Padang Sauce,

5) Shell with Sweet-Sour Flavour,

6) Kangkung cah Tauco

The Foods were done after took a little longer time than I thought, but nevermind, they were still delicious :D. I was afraid that the foods won’t be enough for 6 peoples (actually, we can count as 7 people, since Mas Nunu has belly for 2 people, wekekekekek, sorry Bro, but as a good sister, we have to tell the truth wakakakakka!!!), but amazingly, all those 6 menus were sufficient and satisfied all of us, especially my brother who entusiastic about Bandar Jakarta because he saw it on Kuliner program in TV.

There was Live Music and apparently, there was some people who also celebrated B’Day. So… almost every 5 minutes, we heard "Happy Birthday" and "Selamat Ulang Tahun" songs…

Finally, the time to pay the bill was coming… I held my breath when I opened the book that held the bill, but then I was suprised, the bill stated little number, much less than I thought! I was so thankfull and so guilty (why guilty…? Okay, it was not the first time we went to Bandar Jakarta, the first time we went to Bandar Jakarta was February 2007 and I ordered Supreme Egg Crab and it rocketed  the bill…my sister still put the grudge regarding this matter wekekekek and I can only say "sorry" n grin ;p)

Here is the Bill:

Before we got in the car, we took pictures first in front of the restaurant.

When trying to get out from Ancol, we got lost once, and funny thing was there was a black mini van car that followed us, maybe he thought if he followed us, he would find the way out too…well, sorry we got lost too! wekekekek..

Back at my sister place, Mommy, Mba Dewi, Mas Nunu, n I slept in the same room. Mommy and Mba Dewi slept in bed, Mas nunu on the floor, and I on an extra bed on the floor…It’s been a long time since we ever slept in the same room like this.

The next day, I went up to Mangga Dua Square, I had appointment with my old friend, Ricca. Well, she actually invited me to a seminar with 8,000 peoples. I always feel uncomfortable in the crowd plus, the room was in the dim lights…so for about 2 hours..I felt my stomach growled. At 2pm, I excused my self to meet my other old friends, Tatu (Irma, Mia, and Nura), in Kelapa Gading Mall, at Pizza Hut, for my another belated birthday celebrations. To catch the time, I took a cab that costed me 50,000! But, it’s okay, I can’t wait to meet my sisters!

Finally, I met my sisters, no big changes, only Irma did bonding and she looked gain a little weight. We ordered Pan Pizza Supersupreme, Pitcher of Coke, Salad, and 10 buffalo wings. I did little bit show up, like, "look, look, new shirt, girly huh? only 40,000, and now, at once all of us, look under tabel, my new 3cm high heel sandals only 20,000" We chatted about the present life, past life, and the ‘if’ life.

I told them that I finally submitted my self to femininity, finally I feel comfort with femininity, although I still do have some crazy ideas pop up in my mind wekekekekek…need more time I guess..

Yes, I do finally submit my self to femininity. I even now, feel more comfortable with the way I walk. By submitting my self to femininity, I feel more peacefull.

I dont really know where this started, but I do believe it is the hormone. A strange thing that I can’t even see. I finally understand and admit that body can take over your brain. When I was teenage, whenever I got my period (menstruation), I never felt something change about me emotionally, only physically (well at my early teenage, I felt some hurt in my breast, but scientifically it was normal, the breasts were growing). But…almost mid 20..whenever I got my period, I become very sensitive, sometime I become very bad temperamental (read: very quite, can hardly smile, and spiritless), sometime I feel so melancholic (read: drop tears easily with/without particular reason). At first, I felt disturbed, but slowly but sure..I felt comfort with it.

What I am gonna write down is my wonder about female:

Every month, females get menstruation. Blood drips from the genital for 24hours x approximately 7days, and females have to live as usual. Indeed, there is a thing that can hold the blood. So, there is…every month, females for about 7 days live their live with bloody smelly and dump pants. Every months, for about 7days, females look at the shattered blood minimum about 3 times a day (at least whenever they change the pad), smell the awfull scent of rooten blood about 3 times a day, and feel the hot liquid around their croch 24hours. Some people even feel uncomfortable feeling, such as cramp in their stomach or sore breasts in early days of period. In some company, they serve menstruation day off, but some company dont, so females still have to work.

I still sometime hear males say, "females have tendency to be irrational and emotional," Well, can you control your body? Have you ever felt or experienced what I described above without complaining? what I am trying to say is…females sometimes act irrationally or emotionally not because they are monsters, they do have reasons. Females may be looked as weak creatures, but actually they are strong creatures. I cannot say about giving birth yet because I have not experience any. But, imagine, about 9 months, you live your life with exta weight that grows every second. Then when giving birth, the genital is dilated and again…blood comes out from the body.

So, males…give some respect to females…for females live with a gift/curse as female.. We don’t remember if we’ve been asked to choose the genital before we were born, it is not our fault. No matter what, we are human after all, we are one, so, help each other.

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